Have been quite glum about the state of the nation, the world & X formerly known as Twitter lately but have had a call to remind me that I am needed to make all 3 chuckle

“I think we’re entering into the realms of fantasy”

Listen Very Carefully. Happy Birthday Beautiful Kirsten Cooke. Great actress, Gorgeous Lady. Brilliant as Michelle of The Resistance. Lovely memory at a Lady Ratlings Do with Francesca #KirstenCooke #AlloAllo @francescagonsh ##UpperHand #DawsonWatch #Chucklevision @Lady_Ratlings

Blimey. Had forgotten I had legs. This is probably the last time I got them out …

The classic

I sort of feel at this point if you’re a Jewish member of the Green Party you only have yourself to blame

Pretty sure our picture desk are moonlighting

I saw Imagination at the Bournemouth winter gardens years ago. Leee leapt on stage wearing nothing but a red sequinned jockstrap. Quite eye popping.

Highlight of my birthday so far has been discovering this extraordinary AI generated ‘tapestry’ on Brighton pier promoting ‘the heritage chart’

"He was only a cat" A poignant gravestone to Dewey 1898-1910 #Caturday

This is just rude

I try to get my daily 10,000 goose steps

You can’t fool me this is Ken Masters off Howard’s’ Way

Me: I need to get rid of at least half my books to free up space Also me: I need this 1973 book from the Cheese Information Service

My dad used to completely lose interest in a movie if something stupidly unbelievable happened in it. But understand, this meant that if he was watching a werewolf movie and a character went to the post office on Sunday when they’re closed, he’s stop watching.

“I wouldn’t be able to teach my kids to swim where I learn because the water had been polluted by raw sewage that’d make them sick.” - In 1995, only 46% of English bathing waters met today’s minimum standard. In 2025, 93% did. - In 1988, only 65% of bathing waters met the far lower minimum standards of the time. - This is unsurprising. In the 80s, sewage was routinely discharged into the sea. (Not in exceptional circumstances, but as a matter of practice.) - In Brighton where I live, almost all sewage was pumped directly into the sea without biological treatment until the 2010s. - Until relatively recently, there was essentially no monitoring of storm overflow discharges of sewage. - Some bathing waters have got worse since 2019, but will still be far better than they were in 80/90s - The number of bathing waters classified as poor has increased, but that’s because they are newly classed as bathing waters. - £12bn is being spent over the next five years to halve the number of storm overflows.

WRONG