Milk? You mean fart juice?

giphy has gotten so woke I can't even call my friends retards with gifs anymore

If I save enough Chick-fil-A points god resurrects a chicken

Which is it Blizzard? I'm good or not? @Warcraft Is your software not compatible with Brave?

It’s weird that being “up” for something and being “down” for something mean the exact same thing. Apparently enthusiasm has no respect for the Y-axis.

The "H" in Jesus H. Christ stands for Hoobastank because he died for a reason and the reason is you

Does Reacher just never sleep?

Does it get better no worries if not

Is that a thread ripper?

The secret to not being awkward is to never force conversation. Don’t try to come up with interesting things to say, don’t talk to people for the sake of talking, don’t voice opinions or ask questions to sound smart. Instead, notice your own curiosity and follow it. If you don’t have any, radiate comfort in your silence.

i think we’re being way too casual about dreams

I’ve never been so bad at my JOB that half the country hoped my hospitalization resulted in my death. You’d think that would bring forth some self reflection but instead nothing changes.

Not the horcrux you expected.

a mãe da coco de witch hat atelier

Men only have 5 moods: 1. i need to conquer and start a new country 2. horny 3. i must disappear to the woods 4. my woman and bloodline depend on me 5. i was born in the wrong century